lines and spaces

don't you just love new-journal-day?  when you get to the end of one and start in on the first page of the next? i do! today i did just that. i was really excited about my new journal! i'd had my eye on it for a while and was so glad it was still available when i was ready for it! ( i bought mine at the red caboose  but you can find it here at rifle paper co. ) i opened it up this morning.... and realized: there are no lines.  well, there are those gorgeous gold stripes on the inside of the cover, but other than that the whole book is full of blank pages.  wait, what? i need lines! i panicked just a little.  

there is something you should know about me... i can't do straight lines. in anything. i can't sew a straight line, i can't draw a straight line, i can't walk a straight line, i can't sing a straight line.  i can't even trace a straight line with a ruler!   so a book full of blank pages with no pre-existing straight lines freaks me out.  i'm not an artist. i don't sketch, i don't draw. i write words. preferably on lines!

however.  i thought about that for a second, before i began putting words on the page, and had a bit of a revelation about myself.  in spite of the fact that i seem to feel safer around straight lines, i actually prefer the freedom of the empty space. even when i have lines to work within i typically spend a lot of time outside them. i just use them as moral support.  as a foundation from which i can build out.   so i'm embracing this new found discovery about me self and going with it! 

as i'm contemplating this, the fact that i've just embarked on a whole new kind of journey this past week is not lost on me.  if you haven't seen on facebook, i've launched a kickstarter campaign to raise funds for a new album.  (you can read all about it here... kickstarter ). it's something i've never done. i've never needed to.  but times are different now and if i'm to fulfill the calling i believe God has placed on my life, i need to obey.  and that means doing something foreign, scary,  and new. it feels a lot like writing on a blank page with no lines. 

so i think i'll press on.

i'll look up. 

i'll turn the page.